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 The Good Out of Evil

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joybrennan
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joybrennan

Posts : 4008
Join date : 2010-10-13
Age : 44
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The Good Out of Evil Empty
PostSubject: The Good Out of Evil   The Good Out of Evil EmptyThu Oct 14, 2010 3:10 am



The Good Out of Evil

Post by joybrennan on Wed 18 Aug - 23:47
Reposting:

OK – THE BEGINNING OF THIS STORY WAS WRITTEN BY OUR VERY OWN “ROBERT THE EVIL.” I found it SO disturbing, that I had to try to have something good come out of it...(and he wrote it some time in LATE MAY-EARLY JUNE.

BOTH STORIES ARE --> MA and angst/B&B relationship

Brennan returns from Indonesia having gained perspective and come to the realization that she does indeed love Booth. Not only that, she's ready to try "them" as a couple. She meets him on the mall near the reflecting pool as they'd promised but Booth isn't alone. There's a woman with him, an attractive leggy blonde. He embraces the stunned Brennan, planting a chaste kiss on her cheek, before introducing Alexa Hollande - a reporter for CNN who was embedded with his unit in Afghanistan. Booth saved her life, not once but multiple times, and eventually the two became an item. Brennan is heartbroken and angry, at herself for rejecting him before they left, at Booth for falling in love with another woman, at life in general.

The partners begin a strained relationship, the UST is back but with it is a whole bunch of regular tension and general hostility. Eventually Brennan realizes that Booth genuinely loves Alexa - it's not that he's stopped loving her, but he's in love with his girlfriend now - and she realizes that he's genuinely happy with her and he's still trying hard to be her Booth, to be there for her. Moved beyond belief at her realization Brennan decided to do her best to accept the woman into her life and she asks the couple over for dinner. Brennan makes an effort to be nice and to her horror she finds herself liking the woman and, more importantly, thanking her for being there when Booth needed someone and Brennan wasn't around. Booth thanks Brennan, crushing her in his arms and kissing her hair in gratitude, Brennan melts into his embrace and her heart breaks a little more knowing what she's lost and seeing the love in his eyes for Alexa.

Weeks pass and, much to Angela's consternation, Brennan becomes more comfortable with Booth and Alexa's relationship, even going out to lunch with the woman to plan a party for Booth (in celebration of an award he's to be given). Brennan herself begins dating, a nice stable relatively handsome man who is exactly the type she used to find attractive, before Booth. It's about then that the partners find themselves dealing with a new serial killer - he's clever, he's careful, he's vicious, and as the case drags on he begins targeting Booth. Seeking to take out Booth the serial killer, named The Engineer by the press, sets a trap but Alexa and Brennan - going to Booth's apartment to setup for the surprise party - are the victims instead.

Booth comes home in time to find Brennan there, bound and gagged, and once she's freed she tells him about Alexa and the Engineer. With cold determination, Booth begins hunting the monster who's taken his girlfriend and Brennan, unwilling to leave his side, goes with him. They fail to find her in time, and Alexa's remains wind up on the slab at the Lab. Brennan puts 110% (for the first time she won't argue about how that's not possible) into her examination and pushes everyone else harder too. Booth is so focused on the case that until Brennan collapses/faints from fatigue he hasn't noticed. Taking her home to her apartment he puts her to bed, but in a moment of weakness and need, for both of them, he accepts the comfort she offers him. The two fall into bed together making love until they both pass out from exhaustion.

The morning after a guilt ridden Booth tried to come to terms with what happened - putting it all behind them as a terrible "mistake". Brennan balks at the idea but, seeing how her insistence that it was anything but a mistake hurts him, tells him instead that it was a natural response given the stress they were under. Booth accepts this but warns Brennan that he doesn't want her to talk about it with anyone, it's theirs and he's not proud of it either. Acknowledging his need compartmentalize, Brennan becomes Booth's constant companion, caretaker, and shadow - taking care of him the way he usually took care of her. Together they eventually capture the bastard, with Brennan cornering him and killing him in cold blood so Booth wouldn't have to (his conscious can be clear and his career safe). Brennan is arrested afterwards for shooting an unarmed suspect, but evidence is later recovered by the FBI forensic techs which corroborates Booth's story that the Engineer was armed with a silenced small caliber pistol which he not only brandishes at Brennan, but fired at her. The evidence - bullet fragments, a shell casing, and a spot of gunpowder residue on the back of the Engineer's hand, are enough to get charges against Brennan dropped.

An overzealous AUSA looking to make a name for herself orders an investigation of the entire forensics team of the Jeffersonian but they're cleared of any wrong doing. In the end Booth admits to Brennan that he called in a favor or three and had the evidence planted and the reports modified to ensure that she'd go free - his way of saying thank you for getting Alexa's killer. A stunned Brennan tries to argue with him but stops when he kisses her. The kiss is slow and soft, and over far too soon for her liking. When she tries to kiss him back Booth stops her saying "I can't Bones, not now. Not with Alexa and everything I...I just can't." Booth chokes back the emotion he's feeling and gives her a sad smile. "But rest assured Temperance Brennan, one day soon I'm going to show up on your doorstep and when I do, nothing is gonna stop me from showing you just how much I love you."

We close out the season then with Booth single and grieving, Brennan cautiously hopeful, and both ready to acknowledge their love in season seven.

END OF ROBERT THE EVIL’S STORY


Ok, Robert, this has been bugging me a while – before we found out what horrible evil HH was cooking up. Rolling Eyes So, I had to do something in order for it to not drive me crazy. Hence, my continuation of your story:

THE GOOD OUT OF EVIL


Season seven opens on the same day, only later. Brennan has fallen into a fitful sleep on the couch, her dreams haunted by images of making love with Booth and a bloodied Alexa looking on with hurt, sorrowful eyes. She awakens, shaken and shameful, and quickly sits up. Too quickly, as her eyes widen and she barely makes it to the bathroom before throwing up. Feeling miserable, she goes into the kitchen and pours herself a glass of milk. Sipping it, she starts to make some toast as well. She hears the doorbell ring, but doesn’t move to answer it until she hears Angela’s voice. “Come on, Brennan, you’re the one who wanted to work on this book tonight.” She opens the door, “Hi, Angela.”
Angela comes in with a take out bag and looks at Brennan. “You sound terrible.”
“Yes, I know. I had an incident of emesis and –“
“An incident of what?”
“Emesis, it’s when there is a forcible emptying of the stomach contents –“
“You puked.”
“Puked?”
“Threw-up, vomited.”
“Yes, vomited is another term for it. I find it unpleasant, and it irritates my esophagus.”
“Yeah, not my favorite thing either, maybe you’re coming down with something.”
“No, I won’t be going –“
“I mean maybe you’re getting sick.”
“No, it seems to be a stress reaction of late. Happens once or twice a day sometimes. Haven’t really been –“
“- You’ve been throwing up once or twice a day! Sweetie, for how long?”
How long had it been going on…the days had all gotten so blurry once they found Alexa’s body….” The nausea in her stomach is starting up again. She quickly walks into the kitchen and grabs a slice of the toast.
“Brennan…” Angela has followed her into the kitchen. She places the bag on the counter. “How long?”
“I don’t know, some time after we found…after we found the body.”
“Sweetie! That was almost two months ago! Have you been to a doctor?”
“When would I have had time for that! ….Sorry, Ang, I didn’t mean to yell. I’m just tired and…”
“When’s the last time you saw Robert?’
‘Robert…oh, we broke up right…before all these things happened. He didn’t like all the time I was spending on Booth’s party…”
“OK, then you’re not pregnant.”
Upon hearing the word, Brennan’s logical brain connects the dots quickly. The night with Booth, the way it had felt inside her when he…The color drains from Brennan’s face, and she leans against the counter. “Brennan…” She couldn’t look up. “Brennan, it’s okay…” She feels Angela’s hand brush her shoulder, then wipe a tear off her face she hadn’t known was there. She looks up and meets Angela’s compassionate eyes.
“I can’t be pregnant…” the tears are falling faster now, “he’ll be devastated…”
“Booth.” Angela says it quietly, knowingly. Brennan can’t speak. “When, Sweetie?”
“It wasn’t supposed to happen. I was exhausted, looking at Alexa, at her bones, every day, trying to find any…
“The night you passed out and Booth took you home.”
“Everything just hurt so much…he hurt so much, I just…we” Brennan starts sobbing, and Angela holds her close, letting Brennan rest her head on hers. “It’s going to be okay, Sweetie, it’s going to be ok.”
*******

The next day Booth comes over to the Jeffersonian looking for Brennan. The only person on the lab floor is Jack. “Hey, Hodgkins – you seen Bones around.”
Jack doesn’t even look up. “She’s out sick. Angela stayed with her last night and was taking her to the doctor this morning.”
“Did she say what was wrong?”
“Nope – just that Brennan was sick, so she was staying overnight with her and taking her to the doctor in the morning.”
“…I just saw her yesterday afternoon…”
Jack looks up, “Booth, I’ve learned that when it comes to Angela and Brennan…the less I know the better.
Disturbed, Booth heads to Cam’s office. As soon as he walks in, she shuffles some papers and shoves them in her desk.
“Hey, Seely, what brings you my way today? You aren’t back on cases yet are you?” “No. I was looking for Bones and…”
“She and Angela are out today, Angela is –“
“Taking her to the doctor. Hodgkins told me.” He hesitates a moment – “I just saw her yesterday, she seemed…healthy.”
“Well, maybe Angela convinced her to take a day off. She hasn’t, you know. Even after everyone was cleared, she came in the next day and started working on a bunch of John and Jane Does.”
“That’s how she deals with stuff.”
“Yes. But everyone does have a breaking point.”
“Yeah…What were you working on before?”
“Before what?”
“When I walked in, you stuffed a bunch of papers in your desk.”
“Just clearing out old files,”
Booth looks at her a long moment, “I don’t believe you, Cam, but, I trust you’ll tell me eventually.”
Cam laughs, “There’s nothing to tell. Why don’t you go over to Brennan’s and see how she’s doing.”
Why? Cam has no idea what she’s asking. He shouldn’t go because he’d started to kiss Bones yesterday and the guilt had exploded in his chest. He shouldn’t want to kiss her. He’d just told her he needed time. He shouldn’t want to hold her again…make love to her again. Alexa’s body had been found barely two months ago and he... The tears well up, and he closes his eyes.
“Seely?”
He opens them and sees Cam’s soft brown eyes radiating compassion. Compassion he didn’t deserve. “I was…with her.” He watches Cam’s eyes widen briefly, and then…compassion again. She got up and started towards him. What was wrong with her! “It wasn’t even a week after we found Alexa’s body – it was days, Cam. Days!
“Well, you’ve loved Dr. Brennan for years.”
“That’s no….Years?”
“It seemed pretty clear you two were falling for each other when I got here. I was surprised you didn’t get together after we broke up.”
“Really?”
“Really.” Cam reaches out and gently touches his shoulder. “You met Alexa trying to get over her…it’s not –“
Booth jerks away from her. “I loved Alexa!”
“Yes, you did. You just never stopped loving Dr. Brennan. Seely…you loved them both…and now one of them is gone.” The two lock eyes for a moment and then Booth crumples into sobs on her shoulder. He hadn’t cried when they found the body, or at her funeral – as if not crying could keep her death from being real. He would wake up sometimes with tears on his checks, but while they’d been hunting the monster, he hadn’t let himself really cry about it all. He’d put walls of steel around his heart…except for the day he found Brennan collapsed on the floor in her office…and the night he spent in her bed. His heart had opened up then, but in the morning…the guilt had assailed him. He doesn’t know how long he stood crying in Cam’s arms, but when he looks up, her shirt is soaked through.

“It’s ok Seely.” Cam’s eyes are wet as well. “I think Alexa would…understand. She knew Dr. Brennan was special to you…anyone who cares about you does.”
“That doesn’t mean she’d think I’d be in bed with her.” Having let go of some the pain, Seely could feel himself getting angry again
“She loved you. Loved and knew you enough to know Dr. Brennan was the one to consult about your party.”
“SHE KNEW WE WERE FRIENDS!”
“Best friends. Do you think she’d want you to be alone, without love and passion in your life because she was gone?”
“No…she wasn’t like that, but…”
“She never struck me as a woman who believed in rules or protocol.”
Booth is quiet. No, Alexa hadn’t believed in protocol. She’d been a live for the moment, do what you feel, kind of woman. Nothing like him, in that sense. It was one of things that had attracted him – Alexa would laugh at death – which is why he’d had to keep pulling her out of trouble. “Her favorite saying was life is for living. If you’re worrying about dying, you’re wasting time.”
Cam smiles. “Go check on Dr. Brennan, Seely. You’ll drive yourself crazy worrying otherwise.”
“ – and worrying is wasting time.” He smiles back tentatively, “Thanks, Camille.”
Cam watches him leave before going back to her desk. She pulls out the files she’d been looking at before Booth came in. “Of course that was your favorite saying, Alexa Hollande.” It has taken everything in her not tell Booth the truth. It is too soon, too complicated. Yet, it explained so much.
She wants to hate the woman, but couldn’t blame her, not really. Besides, she’d saved Brennan’s life. Booth isn’t ready to hear that either. Sighing, she closes the file, and gets up to lock it back into her confidential files. She’d been wiping the computer trail of Alexa’s condition off the main Jeffersonian hard drive when Booth came in.
******

Angela is worried. Brennan hasn’t said a word since they’d left the doctor’s office. She’d asked the doctor a few questions, mostly about what the state of her health was in terms of carrying a pregnancy to term. She was fine, a bit worn out, slightly dehydrated. The doctor had given her a prescription for some pre-natal vitamins, told her she needed to drink more water, cut out the coffee, and sleep more. They’d stopped at the pharmacy and gotten the vitamins. Now, sitting next her, Brennan stares blankly out the window.
“You’re pretty quiet over there, Brennan.” Silence, “Sweetie…you wanna grab some lunch or something before –
“No.” Brennan turns away from the window, “I just want to go home.”
“Ok…any preferences?”
“Preferences regarding what?”
“The baby – boy or girl.”
Brennan blinks. “No. I’ll love my child regardless of its gender.”
“Well, that’s good to hear. It’s the most you’ve said about it since the doctor’s”
“I have many things to contemplate, that’s all.”
“Like telling Booth he’s going to be a father again.”
“Yes. I’ll have to have some legal work done so he knows he’ll have equal access to the baby.”
Angela smiles, “I don’t think that will be his first concern.”
“Rebecca sometimes can be awful about him with Parker…I don’t want him to worry about that.”
“I understand, Brennan, but what about actually telling him?”
Angela pulls into the parking lot for Brennan’s place. As she does, they both notice the black SUV, parked next to Brennan’s convertible.
“Looks like you’re going to get the opportunity.”
“I’m not ready to! Angela…he already thinks that our having sex was a mistake.”
Angela winches as she parks on the other side of Brennan’s car. “He said that?”
“Repeatedly.”
Angela hears the choked-back tears even before looking at her. “He didn’t mean it, Sweetie, he’s loved you -
”- Don’t, Angela. Don’t try and make this better.”
They look at each other a long moment before a knock on the window glass breaks their gaze. It’s Booth. Angela rolls down her window. Booth gives a sheepish grin, “So, was it really a doctor’s appointment, or did you ladies go shopping?” His eyes catch the pharmacy bag on Brennan’s lap, and the tears in her eyes. The grin leaves his face. “Guess it was the doctor’s. Bones, you ok?”
Brennan can’t speak; Angela touches Booth hand on the door. “Why don’t you come upstairs with us?” Booth nods, his eyes suddenly bright. “It’s nothing fatal, Booth, don’t worry.”
******

The ride up the elevator is filled with tension. Booth had tried a couple of times to engage Brennan while entering the building, but she’d brushed him off. Now, in the elevator, she’s standing as far away from him as possible, staring straight ahead. He watches her lean again the side and close her eyes.
“Sweetie?” Angela hasn’t missed the move, and Booth notes her concern.
“Just nauseous, Ang.”
The ding of the floor indicator goes off and the doors slide open. Brennan leaves quickly, walking briskly to her apartment, Booth starts after her, but Angela catches his arm.
Let her go, Booth.” They walk slowly towards Brennan’s door.
“What the hell is going on?”
“She’s got to be the one to tell you. I can tell you she probably had to throw-up – that’s why she bolted.”
“Ulcer?”
Angela smiles and shakes her head, “No means no, Booth.”
Brennan is emerging from the bathroom when they enter. She seems pale and shaky to
Booth and he wants to go to her – only Angela’s hand on his arm stops him.
“Sweetie?”
“I think I need to go lay down.”
“Alright, that’s it. What is going on!”
He watches the women have an entire conversation without saying a word. It took three seconds.
“I should go.”
“Ang –“
“- This is not something I should be here for, Brennan. I’ll check in with you later. I promise.” She walks over to Brennan and hugs her.
“Well, I’m not going anywhere until –“
”No one is expecting you to Booth. ” She whispers into Brennan’s ear, “He loves you, Brennan. Trust me, he does.”
Angela smiles as she walks past Booth and out the door.
“You look exhausted.”
“I am.”
Booth takes a step towards her. She doesn’t bolt, and he crosses the room to be next to her. “Angela said it wasn’t fatal…what’s so bad, Bones? What’s so hard to tell me?”
“I really need to sleep Booth.”
“Just tell me.”
Brennan sighs, “If I tell you, you have to promise to let me sleep after, no interrogations.”
“OK”
“I’m pregnant, about two months in gestation.” She watches his face, and sees when the realization of what she’s told him occurs. She’s surprised at the small smile that crosses his face. “Why were you afraid to tell me?”
The gentleness in his voice is overwhelming. She can barely get the words out, “You said it was a mistake. I didn’t want to hear you say this was also.”
Booth is shocked. A mistake, their baby? He tries to follow the logic.”
“I would NEVER ask you to, to get rid of –“
“I know, Booth.” Her eyes close briefly. “I really need to go lay down.”
“Yes, that’s right; you need to rest, sleep, drink milk-”
“- Booth,” Despite herself, Brennan cracks a smile. “Don’t mention milk right now – I just had, I just threw up”
“Oh,” he reaches out and touches her shoulder, more like a caress than a touch, “You get some sleep, baby…but, I’m gonna stick around, and be here when you wake up, ok?”
His eyes are anxious looking at her, and she is just too tired to argue. “Fine.” She turns and walks towards her bedroom.
“Temperance.” She turns and looks at him, “It’s not a mistake – not any of it.” For a long moment, they watch each other. Brennan is the one to turn away. She doesn’t answer him, just goes into her room and closes the door.
******

How long has he been dozing? Booth isn’t sure, but he is sure that the crying that has woken him up is coming from Brennan’s room. He walks over and knocks gently. The desperate sobbing continues. He opens the door. Brennan is lying on the bed, rocking back and forth in an almost fetal position. Tears are streaming down her face. Rushing over to her, he quickly realizes she’s not awake, just having a bad dream. He sits on the edge of the bed beside her and gently rests a hand on her shoulder.
“Temperance…wake up.” Her head is shaking ‘no’ back and forth on the pillow, so he brushes the hair off her face. “It’s me, Bones. It’s Booth. Come on, baby, wake up.” She doesn’t wake, but the rocking gradually stops. ‘That’s my girl, it’s all okay, it’s okay…,” he continues stroking her hair back, and to his surprise, she turns her body into him, and nestles her head against his thigh, one arm draped over his leg. Her eyes are still closed, she’s still asleep…but she is clinging to him. Gradually, the crying stops. At least hers does. Somewhere between joy and sadness Booth’s eyes have teared up. The joy is that in sleep, when all the walls are down, she trusts him. Yet, there is sadness, because he remembers the look in her eyes when she reminded him of his own words, of their making love being a mistake. He didn’t know if he could heal that wound completely, not with her. Alexa may have been soft and helpless physically, but emotionally had been far less fragile; she could take his rages like Teflon, to the point of laughing at him and saying, “Call me when you’re over it.” It made her an excellent reporter. Temperance was different, she’d taken out the Engineer like a pro, single shot, didn’t even flinch. Dirt, muck, murder, reflexes like a cat, physically able to take on a guy larger than herself and flip him to the floor – a real Wonder Woman. Physically, it took a hell of a lot to break her. Emotionally...buried beneath those stone shields, her fiery core is cased in glass, easily shattered… Slipping his shoes off his feet, he moves her arm slightly and slides into bed next to her. Now her head is on his chest, one arm splayed across him. She will be mad about this when they wake up, but for now, it is more important that she sleep. .”I love you, baby.” He whispers it softly, before closing his eyes…It wasn’t until he has nearly drifted off himself that it occurs to him that it’s the first time in a while that he’d been able to think about Alexa without tearing up. He kisses the top of Brennan’s head, his arms tightening around her, and falls asleep.
******

“Hey Brennan, how about you come over to dinner tonight? Angela has sauntered into Brennan’s office, an innocent smile on her face. Brennan is looking at a series of photos – bones, of course. “I can’t Angela.” Brennan doesn’t even look up. “Booth is picking me up…” She carefully circles a few points on one of the photos. “This absolutely cannot be the genuine bones of a man said to be born circa 1300’s.”
“What are you talking about?”
“These photographs are of bones said to belong to St. Francis of Assisi – but these markings here, here, and here, clearly show that the diet of the man in question was lacking in iron and magnesium, which immediately places them out of the Renaissance area, more towards the Dark Ages – when salt was not so readily available.”
“Wonderful. What does that have to do with Booth and coming over to dinner?”
“They have no correlation at all, Ang.”
Angela rolls her eyes. “Exactly. So, again, I ask you, why can’t you come over tonight?”
Brennan looks up. Angela’s eyes are fierce, intent. Brennan sighs. “Booth’s been staying with me since Monday.”
Angela’s eyes widen, “Really? What’s up with that?”
What indeed. Brennan isn’t even sure how it had become Friday and Booth is still camping out on her couch. Well, sort of on her couch. He does start there, but she’d wake up each morning with him in bed with her. Worse, she is always somehow wrapped around him. The first morning he’d told her about the nightmare that he couldn’t wake her up from. She knew she has them, but hadn’t about to tell him what they entailed. However, she also noticed that she’d felt more rested than she had in long time….so she didn’t argue with him about fixing her breakfast: Toast and strawberry jam, and apple juice. She’s now been having it all week. Then, from across the table, he’d taken her hand, “Temperance, I…you don’t have to go through this alone… let me be here for you. I want to be here…” She isn’t good at reading faces, but over the years, she has learned his. His voice is gentle, caring and quiet, but his eyes are pleading. She thinks about Rebecca, and all he’d missed when she'd been pregnant with Parker, and nods. She just couldn’t say no. Of course, she hadn’t thought him being here for her meant him staying at her apartment, driving her to work and picking her up after. ”He wants to be involved.”
“I told you that a long -.”
“- With the process, Angela, not me. The things he couldn’t do when Rebecca –“
“Hey, Bones. Angela.” Booth’s voice is bright and cheery. He’s holding a white paper bag. “Got something for you, Bones.” He pulls out a toasted bagel. “Tada!”Angela laughs. Even Brennan gives him an amused look.
“Or – if you don’t want that, I’ve got chocolate…” He pulls a dark chocolate bar out of his pocket, “you’re favorite kind.”
Brennan gives in to a small chuckle, rolling her eyes and shaking her head. “You see my point, Ang?”
“Yeah…keep telling yourself that.”
:”Telling herself what?”
“Nothing.” Brennan and Angela answer at the same time.
“So, what’s it gonna be – bagel or chocolate?
Brennan’s eyes dart back and forth between the two items. Then, rather empathically, says,” Chocolate.”
Booth laughs and hands he the bar.
“Brennan, we’re talking this weekend.” Angela’s voice was stern.
“She’ll call you.”
“Booth!”
Angela eyebrows arch. Brennan looks at her, exasperation clearly showing. “I’ll call you.”
Angela stifles a laugh and nods. “Bye, Seely.”
She leaves and Brennan glares at Booth.
“What?”
******

She’s been quiet during the drive home. He tries joking around with her, but she isn’t having it, a cryptic, “Don’t try conversing with me right now” is her only comment. It not until they get into her apartment that she speaks. “Why are you here?”
Booth stares at her blankly, “What you mean?”
“I know I am with child – and it’s your child. I even understand that you might want to participate in, in this pregnancy experience because you didn’t with Rebecca. However, I, I am not a child, and I don’t like being treated like one.”
Booth is quiet a moment. “I’m sorry. That’s not what I was aiming for, Bones …I just want to take care of you.”
“You don’t have to.”
“I know that. I said I want to.”
“I wouldn’t let anything happen to the baby, Booth. You don’t have to worr-”
“- I know that, too” He takes a step towards her, then another. “It’s not about that.”
Brennan doesn’t move, “Then why…”
Booth reaches out, brushes the line of her jaw. “When I kissed you Sunday, do you remember what I said?”
She can barely breathe; talking is out of the question.
“I said, I was going to show up on your doorstep, and that NOTHING was going to keep me from showing you how much I love you.”
“You also said you weren’t over Alexa’s death – a perfectly reasonable emotion. What changed in a day? You found out –“
“No. I didn’t know you were pregnant when I was waiting for you on Monday.”
“You knew something was wrong.”
“I knew I couldn’t lose you. I knew if something was wrong, I wanted to fix it. I knew I loved you, loved you long before Alexa. I loved you both, Temperance. I love you, still.”
He moves to kiss her, but she turns away, “I want to believe you, Booth.”
Gently he touches her face, and she looks at him. “I know you do. That’s why I’m here –to help you believe.”

Brennan turns away first. He is too close, too caring, and too easy to kiss. She’s not ready to kiss him, and not ready to kiss him and stop. Unconsciously, her hand touches her stomach. Booth notices. “You can’t tell yet you know.”
“Can’t tell what?”
“That you’re pregnant.” Booth’s hand covers hers over her stomach. “You aren’t showing at all.”
“Oh…” Her eyes shift to his hand resting on hers, while her mind goes to the small cells inside her that were dividing and dividing. Cells that would, in a short while, become a fetus, then a child… One conceived when his hands had touched her everywhere.…
“Hey.” Booth’s voice is raspy and soft. She meets his eyes and they are darker, the pupils dilated, as she knows her own are. He is remembering too. “Yeah, Bones, I remember. Every time I look at you.” His mouth curves up slightly in a smile as his thumb caresses the back of her fingers.” It didn’t feel like a mistake, making love with you.”
She pulls away then, the words awaking the memory of that morning. Booth cringes, why had he said that? Brennan heads toward the kitchen, Booth stays where he is, but keeps talking.
“That’s why I kept saying it was. Because it didn’t feel a mistake. It felt right, like where I was meant to be. Only how could that be when I’d loved Alexa?
I remember everything from that night. The way you pulled my shirt off so the buttons popped away, that first taste of your skin, sucking on your neck.”
“Stop it, Booth.” She is standing by the toaster, her back to him, so he can’t see her hands shaking.”
“No, I want you to understand – that night, the only thing that mattered, the only person I was thinking about, was aware of, was you: Temperance Brennan - even when I was crying. All I knew was you were holding me and it was okay to cry like that. I needed to cry and hear you say ‘it’s okay, Booth,” and feel your hands stroking my hair. Even if I didn’t remember why I was sad.”
Brennan turns around then, “I don’t understand what you mean.”
“I mean that I wasn’t thinking about Alexa that night. I wanted you. I wanted to be with you. Yeah, I wanted the pain to go away, but what was hurting was about you: thinking about you passed out on the floor, finding you tied up, and what if you’d died too…I wouldn’t make if I’d lost you, Bones, but I hadn’t lost you. When we made love, it wasn’t about Alexa – that’s why I was so upset in the morning. We didn’t just have meaningless sex, and I knew it. And I hadn’t thought about Alexa at all. That morning I felt like I’d betrayed her – by loving you...So I called it a mistake. The only ‘mistake’ was me saying that about our making love.”
“That doesn’t explain yesterday. You felt guilty kissing me, and today you...”
“Want to. Yeah, I do…but I won’t...not without permission, ok? Cam helped me see some things…when I told her what -”
“Cam?” Brennan makes a face, “So now Cam knows we slept together?”
“As does Angela.”
“Yes. However, I have never had a sexual relationship with Angela.”
Booth pauses, “That almost sounds like jealousy.”
“No, it’s me not wanting my boss knowing that I’ve slept with her ex-boyfriend.”
“Definitely jealousy.”
She feels like hitting him.
“The point, Bones, is that Cam reminded me about how long I’ve been in love with you. Way before Alexa, way before I even realized it. When you left…I just didn’t think we would ever happen. I wasn’t even sure if you were actually in love with me. I just wanted…to be loved and Alexa was there…I never stopped loving you, I just let myself love Alexa, too.”
Booth watches Brennan anxiously. She hasn’t turned around.
“When did you realize I was in love with you?”
The relief pours through him. She isn’t denying it.
“The night we made love. You kept…saying it. You were crying, too.
“People say a lot of things during sex.”
“We didn’t just have sex.”
She turns around then, shaky and pale. There’s a slight smile on her face, but her eyes seem sad to him. “No, we didn’t.” She turns and throws up in the sink.
Booth is by her side instantly, his hand on her back, holding her hair back. After a minute, the heaving stops, but she doesn’t look up. “It’s okay, baby…it’s part of being pregnant.”
She is so tired. Tired of unexpected emesis, the loss of emotional control, caused (she tells herself) by all the hormones traveling through her bloodstream. Most of all, she is tired of fighting Booth. She knows he isn’t really over Alexa, and she isn’t sure if she believes him when he says that he loves her too, but he is here, her best friend, and the only man she’s ever let herself love. He’s here with her, even if it was just because she was pregnant. She turns around and lays her head on his shoulder. “I know.” She feels Booth’s arms encircle her, his hand smooth down her hair, “I just don’t like it.” Booth chuckles, “I don’t think you’re supposed to, Bones.”
******

Later that evening, Brennan watches Booth start to make up the couch. “Booth”
“Yeah.” He doesn’t turn around.
“You’re going end up sleeping in my bed anyway. You might as well start there.”
Booth turns and looks at her. She’s uncomfortable, that he can tell, but she’s sincere. He smiles a little, trying to put her at ease. “You may have a point.”
Brennan chuckles, and Booth grins. “So, maybe we’ll just start there,”
He hadn’t meant to say we, but he’s not sorry about the Freudian slip either. He watches the uncertainty in her eyes, and continues to hold her gaze, hoping…
“Yes…I guess we start there.”
******


Booth takes his time getting ready for bed, knowing she’d feel awkward if they went to sleep at the same time. When he walks into the room, she’s curled on her side, facing away from what is meant to be “his” side of the bed. He slides in next to her. He feels the heat of her body calling to him, but resists the urge to spoon against her. Instead, he closes his eyes…

She is warm and soft against him. Her dark silky hair like water against his chest, as she trails kisses across his shoulder, nips gently circling down…Booth’s eyes snap open. Brennan has shifted in her sleep. She is, in fact, curled against him, one arm draped across his torso, and her head against his chest, and…he suddenly sucks in his breath – she is kissing his chest, making soft sounds he’s heard from her only once before. His arms tighten around her spasmodically, his hand combs through her hair. “Baby.” he brushes a kiss on the top of her head, turns her head to kiss her – and sees her eyes are closed. It takes him a moment to realize she’s asleep. Sweet Jesus, she’s making love to him in her sleep. Booth tries to calm himself. Difficult, since his body doesn’t know she’s sleeping. He brushes her hair back again, as her lips brush lower on his chest. She shifts her legs so her thigh is between his own. Oh…he remembers this… They’d fallen into her bed at that point, his shirt long gone, her bra, too. She’d ended up on top of him, locked in a frantic kiss. He’d felt desperate to be inside her and broke the kiss to pull at her skirt, when he did, she’d started kissing his body: check, neck, chest. Her mouth was hot, wet, and…

Brennan gasps, snapping Booth’s attention back to the present. Oh, God. He knows that look, knows those sounds, she’s… Brennan screams, her body arched in tension. Booth watches the pleasure in her face, and breathes deeply. She’s incredible in orgasm, beautiful and wild. His body aches to go with her, and only his mind - repeating, “she’s asleep. She’s asleep!” – keeps him from going there. As he’s calming his own breathing, she rolls away from him, lying on her back, shielding her face, and tears are coming from her closed eyes. “I’m sorry Alexa, I’m sorry. It just…I didn’t mean for you to die, I didn’t…I didn’t” She’s crying harder now, “I didn’t want you dead, I just…I’m sorry. It should have been me, I know. It should have been me.” Sobbing, Brennan rolls on her side and curls up in almost fetal position.

It happened so quickly and yet slowly. The shock of what he’s just seen takes a moment to register. Her nightmares, the thing that made her cry every night, was their making love…and Alexa. Booth finds himself crying. All the time he’d been angry with himself, hating himself, it had never occurred to him that Temperance…Temperance felt guilty, too. She wished she…had died. Her instead of Alexa. He makes himself picture Alexa’s broken body, and feels a wave of sadness. Then he tries to picture Bones…bile rises in his throat and he feels himself start to shake. In a flash, he knows he isn’t sorry it was Alexa. If he’d had to lose one of them…

She is still sobbing and rocking, and he realizes this was probably when he’s come into the room…and that what had been waking him up wasn’t her crying. It was her passionate cry out when she dreams about them making love. He moves across the bed and spoons her body, while murmuring soothing words in her ear against her hair. “It’s ok, baby. It’s not your fault, It’s not your fault, and it shouldn’t have been you, I’m so glad it wasn’t you – I don’t know what I’d do if it had been you…I love you so much, I need you, more than anyone, I need you, baby, sweet baby….”
Her sobbing is quieting. He kisses her temple, her cheek. Unbidden, his hand moves caressingly across her torso, her chest, brushes the side of breast, the line of her cleavage.
“Booth…” Brennan’s voice is thick with sleep.
”Yeah, it’s me, baby. You were dreaming again.”
“Hmmm…that feels good.”
He should let her fall back asleep. He should stop touching her the way he was. He should…. Brennan takes his hand and places it firmly on her breast. He teases her nipple, feels it pebbling between his fingers.
“Temperance.” He mouth finds her neck and sucks it wetly. Brennan moans, and turns in his arms. Her eyes are sleepy, but wide open. He stares into the fathomless blue and she gives him a sleepy smile. “Thanks for waking me up.” Then she kisses him.
******

Booth wakes up first. Brennan is wrapped around him again, the same as all the other mornings. Only, this time she’s wrapped around him completely naked – as is he. He can’t help it, a grin breaks out across his face. Sweet, sleepy, sex. It had been so good! Holding her, touching her, whispering I love you against her skin, kissing her, sliding inside her… The pace had been languid, like slow moving lava rising to the surface. His hot little volcano: Temptress Brennan. He snuggles her closer, kisses the top of her head, and sighs contentedly.

Brennan smiles against his chest as she feels Booth’s arms tighten around her, his lips brush her hair. She listens to his heart beating, slow and steady – the way he’d been last night. The memory makes her smile widen. Had she felt this way the first time? Maybe…only she had woken up first and kissed him awake…Maybe this time…this time he wouldn’t think it was a mistake.

Booth feels her fear rising, and lightly smoothes his hand down her back. “It wasn’t a mistake, Bones. Not then and not now.” She relaxes again, and Booth kisses her temple, along the side of her cheek. She feels his hands tug at her waist and helps him shift her body so she’s on top of him again, staring into his deep brown eyes. “My mistake, baby, was letting you go at all.”
“Don’t, Booth. You lo-“
“- I did, but not…not like I’ve loved you.”
“I’m the one who said no.”
“I pushed too hard…I”
Brennan senses the tears welling up in her eyes again. He’s trying to reassure her…of course, it wasn’t true, she’d pushed him away and he’d moved on quickly. Still, the gesture feels pleasurable to her and she allows herself to touch his face, the early morning stubble prickly against her fingertips.

Booth watches emotions play across her face, doubt and desire, fear and trust. Her eyes become focused on his face, following the path of her fingers. Playfully, he nips at the one tracing his lips, and she rewards him with a smile.
“If it takes the rest of my life Temperance Brennan, I’m gonna prove that I love you, more than anyone else, ever. YOU, baby, are the love of my life.” He moves to pull her down for a kiss, but she stops him. “Parker.”
“Parker?”
“It’s Saturday, Booth. Don’t you have to get Parker?”

******

It is sunny out. Speeding along in Booth’s SUV Brennan lays her head back against the seat and closes her eyes beneath her sunglasses.
“You alright, Bones?”
“Yes, I’m still physically adjusting to pregnancy…I seem to need more sleep than before.”
“Well, you did sleep less last night.” He glances over in time to see the answering smile cross her face.
“Yes, I did have less sleep.”
“I should have let you sleep in.”
“Hmmm...no. Rebecca will be much nicer about being late if I’m there.”
Booth glances sharply at her again, “That’s why you wanted to come?”
“Umhmm…”
“Hmph. What makes you think she’s not going to say anything?”
“Observation and logic.
“Which translates into what, Bones?
“She’ll only argue about Parker when it’s just you. She makes Parker go in the house or car if she wants to make a point. The times I have seen her with you and Parker, she is always very understanding about circumstances that inconvenience her. She doesn’t realize that I am often right next to you when she yells on the phone about the very thing she’s being so nice about.”
Booth laughs. His Temperance is definitely becoming more aware of things. He figures he won’t mention that he’d thought the same thing about bringing her along. Perhaps not as distinctly thought out, though. He’d started feeling a bit guilty when she talked about needing sleep…”
“You’re not planning on telling Parker today are you?”
Sweet Jesus, he hasn’t even thought about it. He needs to think about it, he –
“Booth.”
She’s sitting up to look at him. “No, I wasn’t thinking about today.”
“Good.” She relaxes back against the seat.
“I am going to have to tell him at some point.”
“Yes. However, not until I get through the third month. The embryo is still vulnerable to…” She can’t finish the sentence. He looks over again. She’s biting her lip and though he can’t really see her eyes, he guesses they’re tearing up. He knows the word she couldn’t get past her lips: Miscarriage.
“The doctor said you were fine, Bones.” His tone is quiet, soothing. It touches him, her sudden inability to spout clinical terminology in reference to their child.
“Parker’s had enough changes for awhile. You were gone, came back with Alexa, and then…”
He doesn’t like the way this conversation is turning darker. “He hadn’t really connected to Alexa yet, I do that kind of thing slowly.”
“Hmm.”
“Of course, telling him about you – I could do that today, no problem.”
Dead silence.
“Temperance?”
He looks over, and smiles gently. Brennan has fallen asleep.
******

Snuggled in his sleeping bag Booth marvels at his day. Rebecca had been waiting outside with Parker when they arrived. Just as Bones predicted, Rebecca’s frown turned to a smile when she saw Bones. What surprised him was the gentle, pleased grin at Parker’s enthusiastic greeting of Bones. As Parker had gotten in, Rebecca leaned into his window, “Nice to see you, Dr, Brennan. Parker always has such a good time at your pool. I’ve never had a chance to say thank you.”
“Oh…it’s not a difficulty. I’m rarely there with them.”
Booth held his breath, but Rebecca laughed, “I know. Still, it’s a nice thing to do.”
Booth was still trying to make sense of that interaction, while Parker was bouncing in the back seat, asking if Bones was going to come to his game today. She’s never seen him play, only practice once, and it would be really cool if she came. They hadn’t really talked about the day past picking Parker up and it worried him, but Bones had smiled at Parker and said yes, that was the plan. When Booth told her about the game, she’s wanted to go. After the game they’d gone for pizza, Bones had three slices, which impressed Parker to no end. A swim in Bones’ pool while she took a long nap, and then…after racing Parker to the shallow end, they’d sat panting together on the ledge.
“Dad…”
“Yeah.”
“I really like Bones.”
“I know. I like her, too.”
“I mean, I really like her, like…love her. Not like you or mom, but…is that okay?”
He’d looked at his son, hair flat and dripping. “Of course it is, Parker…I love her, too.”
“I just wondered because…”
“Because what?”
“Because I didn’t love Alexa, and – “
He’d hugged Parker fiercely. “It doesn’t matter, Parker. You hardly knew her.”
“You loved her.”
“Yes I did, but you didn’t have to. If I made you think –“
“No, you didn’t Dad. I just…you’ve been happy today. You haven’t been since she died.”
He’d teared up holding him. He’d tried so hard to keep that from him. He kissed the top of his head. “Yeah...I’m happy today.” He let Parker go, and smiled at him.
“It’s Bones isn’t it. You’re happy Bones is hanging out with us.”
Booth laughed, “You are a very smart guy. And a very wet guy. Think it’s time to be to be heading home.”
“One last race!”
Before Booth could move, Parker was off the ledge and swimming away. Booth shook his head, and took off after him.

Parker was even smarter than he thought. They’d gone up to Bones’ apartment to change, and she’d just woken up. Parker, in his best sweet, innocent, puppy look (he’d inherited it from Booth) asked if Bones could over for dinner and a sleepover. He and Dad, liked to take sleeping bags and camp out in front of the TV. playing video games. She could sleep in Dad’s room, since “girls don’t like sleeping on the ground.” Her eyes met his over Parker’s head, questioning. Booth gave a slight nod and she smiled at him and said, “Sure, why not.”

Parker turns in his sleeping bag. He’s finally asleep. Brennan had gone to bed earlier. He slips out of his sleeping bag, and tiptoes into his bedroom. Brennan had fallen asleep hugging his pillow. He sets the alarm on his nightstand and slides into bed next to her. “Booth, what are you doing?” Brennan rolls over and looks at him sleepily.
“Getting some sleep.”
:”You can’t leave Parker by himself!”
Booth chuckles, “I do it every time we camp out. No way I’m trying to spend the night sleeping on the floor. I just get up at 5:00 and slip back into the sleeping bag.”
“But what if –“
“He never does, Bones. Trust me, now, come here.”
“We are NOT –“
“No, we’re not. I just want to hold you.”
Their eyes meet and hold. Then Brennan turns into his arms, and Booth wraps them around her.
“Sweet dreams, Baby.”
“Do you mean me or the fetus?”
“You, Bones, I meant you.”
Brennan is giggling against his chest. Booth turns her head to look at her.
“You knew what meant, didn’t you.”
“Yes,” She’s still quietly laughing, “but it was fun to let you think I didn’t.”
“You…”Booth plants a sudden, quick kiss on her mouth. “I love you.”
He holds his breath, but Brennan smiles back at him, “and I love you.” She kisses him again. Then they kiss again…Brennan pulls away. “We aren’t doing that, remember?”
“Yeah, yeah. We’re going to sleep.”
Brennan cuddles against his chest again. They close their eyes…and fall asleep.

EPILOGUE

Brennan still has her doubts – and Booth (ONCE AGAIN) has to do a lot of reassuing that he actually loves her – while dealing with cases, and Brennan’s pregnancy. Their biggest issue – Booth wants to marry Brennan, and Brennan is dead set against it…until a few facts come out about Alexa.

Alexa, as it turns out was dying of rare genetic heart disorder – which she knew about when she met Booth. Hence her working in a war zone and constantly throwing herself in harms way. It is also why, when the Engineer sprung his trap, Alexa revealed herself as Booth’s girlfriend, making her a better target than Temperance to take. A fact Cam eventually reveals to Booth. She does this after Booth finds a letter from Alexa to him, thanking him for loving her, and thanking Temperance, for not making him chose between them. She knew as soon as she met Temperance that Temperance was in love with Booth, so in love she chose not get in the way of what she saw as Booth’s happiness:

…I couldn’t believe you didn’t see she how much in love with you she is. You’re usually so perceptive. I also know, if she’d chosen to tell you that day at the fountain, it would have torn you up, because she’s the woman you loved when you met me…,and you most likely would have left me. I don’t know if the situation was reversed that I could have done the same, sparing you the pain of choosing… I’m too selfish for that… Obviously…. I wanted to know what it felt like to be loved before I died, and then I met you. Thank you for that, Seely, for loving me. However, I only borrowed you. I was never the woman you were meant to spend your life with. Do not feel guilty, not for a minute, when you turn to Temperance – and I know you will - even if its on the day I died. She’s always been the love of your life. She’d do anything for you, anything to make you happy. Unlike me…I’m sorry for the suffering Seely. Forgive me.

Love,
Alexa

Brennan stares at letter. At five months pregnant, it was good that she is sitting down.
“She knew, Temperance.” Booth stands looking at her. Sad, calm, loving. Booth.
“Why didn’t I see this in the autopsy report? ...Cam.”

Booth nods. “Yep. She didn’t want any evidence to cloud what the Engineer did to Alexa.”
He said it so calmly. It still startles her that he can speak of Alexa with such detachment – as if it had been years since she’d been killed instead of months. He’d tried explaining to her – that he hadn’t loved Alexa that long to begin with – but it still felt like he was trying to protect her. Lately though, she’d begun to think that his wanting to protect her meant…something.

_________________


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PostSubject: Re: The Good Out of Evil   The Good Out of Evil EmptyWed Oct 20, 2010 3:10 pm

Nice extension to an interesting story. I'm all for angst but B&B have to be together in the end. Very Happy
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